Archive for Prayer

Ministering to Members Going through a Crisis

It’s time.”

I knew exactly what that statement meant, even at 2:30 in the morning, because I was ready for the call. The young couple that I ministered to in my church had begun to experience a nightmarish, tragic scenario as their newborn son became sick. In fact, within the first two weeks of his life, his health went from bad to worse, and day after day he was attended to by the staff at the hospital, a long two-hour drive away.

As their pastor, I visited them often, making the four-hour round trip to and from the hospital just to pray, read Scripture, and minister to them by being present. Yet I knew that I couldn’t be there all of the time, and so they had an open invitation for the parents to call me anytime during this crisis, day or night, especially if things took a turn for the worst.

Thus, the call: “It’s time.

Wiping the sleep from my eyes, I jumped out of bed, got dressed, and started to head out to the car to make the two-hour drive. My wife joined me, and we made the trip to the neonatal ward with the intent to comfort and console the distraught parents and grandparents. As the two-week-old breathed his last, there we were together, praying, crying, and loving on each other in the presence of God.

That was over fifteen years ago, but I remember it like it was yesterday. Every year, the mom mentions her son’s birthday on Facebook, and every year, I am reminded of God’s grace through such a difficult time. But how should someone minister to someone in a crisis such as this?

Here are five takeaways that may be helpful:

  1. Be present. There is something to be said about the ministry of presence in a crisis. It doesn’t mean that you need to be there all the time, but you do need to be there from time to time. Strategically being available and easily accessible (at least on a short-term basis) to those in a crisis can be helpful and a comfort to those in need.
  2. Share the Word. In my rush, I didn’t bring my Bible and it was before smartphones existed. However, I was thankful that I memorized several meaningful passages of Scripture, including Psalm 23. This proved to be such a soothing experience as I spoke the words of Scripture from the heart to their hearts. Sharing Scripture allows those in pain to hear words of comfort and peace straight from the heart of God.
  3. Pray peacefully. We prayed, but I made sure that as I prayed, that my love for the family was felt. Thus, they heard my words as I prayed to the Lord and heard my heart as it broke for them. Also, I made sure that my prayers were subservient to the will of God. In other words, we laid the request at the foot of the cross, but we did it with a desire for God to bring us peace, no matter the outcome.
  4. Show emotion. Some would disagree, but I believe that it is normal and natural for the caregiver to show emotions with those who are grieving. After all, Jesus did (see John 11:35). Don’t be afraid to shed a tear with those you love, yet be sure to make this about you comforting them rather than the other way around.
  5. Follow up. Often when a crisis occurs, a short term means of support is needed for the family to walk through it. However, a longer means of support might also be needed. Weeks, months, or even years after the crisis, the family still needs ministry. This is especially true when holidays, birthdays, or anniversaries come around. Be organized and set yourself up with reminders to follow up periodically and during those occasions with the member, whether it’s by means of a card, a call, or some other point of contact.

Ministry isn’t easy, and crises occur all around us. If you set a plan to minister with both short and long-term perspectives in mind, you will be able to love those through the tragedies that they may be going through. Most of all, you will be able to point them to the One who comforts them most of all, Jesus Christ.


Dr. Fran Trascritti is a husband, father, and grandfather to 13 beautiful children. He is the Growth Team Leader for the Illinois Baptist State Association. He and his wife, Teresa, live in Springfield, IL.

Forming Prayers Partners and Teams

This series has has shown that prayer is not optional for our groups. Prayer partners and teams are essential ways to display the power of prayer in individual lives, in the group, and in our world.

There are many questions that need to be answered before launching prayer partners. These include the following and so many more: Are partners two or more people? When will partnership start and end? On what will they focus their praying? How frequently will they pray and in what venue.

In the book, It Begins with Prayer, after Dwayne McCrary asks how to partner up people in the group, he asks these 7 critical questions:

Are we asking them to pray with each other weekly or monthly? How will they decide on what day they will pray? Are we expecting them to meet face-to-face, by phone, by texting, or by some other means? How will we help them understand the need for building trust and keeping things confidential as much as possible? How will we explain the value of praying with a partner within the group? How do we deal with those who decide not to participate? What is the duration of the partnership—a year, six months, until Jesus comes back?

p. 26, It Begins with Prayer, by Dwayne McCrary

Prayer Partners

Your experience may differ from mine, and that’s fine. I have seen great benefits from prayer partners including only two people of the same gender who meet twice weekly: (1) by phone at a scheduled time and (2) during group time for 2-5 minutes. After checking on each other, they should check on (and write down) personal prayer concerns and then get down to the business of praying about those concerns and any others requested by the class or church. Of course prayer will continue beyond these times.

One of the reasons why I believe two prayer partners are better than 3+ is simply that there tends to be less talking and more prayer. Prayer should be the focus. In fact, another method is simply each person praying for their own personal requests rather than sharing them. This shares the requests during prayer with the other person. Those requests will need to be written down after prayer (so they can be remembered and lifted up in prayer).

I don’t want to diminish the importance of relationships and trust during prayer. In fact, they are essential in order to be honest and open in our requests and prayer. But at the same time, prayer is the focus. Ensure that prayer receives at least half of the time together.

Prayer Teams

In my mind, prayer teams are different than prayer partners. They would meet less frequently. They would have 3-7 members who focus on one or more specifically assigned/requested topics. The duration of the teams might be shorter or the assigned/requested topics might change. These could be cottage prayer meetings monthly or bimonthly.

Why did I narrow the team to a maximum of 7 members? In my experience, it is easy for a group to allow one or more members of a group of 8+ not to talk or pray. The larger groups don’t do this intentionally, but keeping teams smaller helps this to be less likely to take place.

Which Do I Choose?

Consider the differences between partners and teams. Review the questions above. Then I want to challenge you to enlist prayer partners or teams. Then watch as prayer empowers and changes the lives of group members, the class, and those for whom they pray!

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Darryl Wilson serves as the Sunday School & Discipleship Consultant for the Kentucky Baptist Convention. He is the author of Disciple-Making Encounters: Revolutionary Sunday School and the Sunday School Revolutionary blog.

Connect through others: Share with your one

Is your church eating itself?

Author and management consultant Peter Drucker once said, “Culture eats strategy for breakfast.”

As a pastor, you experience it when you step on the platform and attempt to motivate your congregation. You see heads nod in agreement and even hear a few say “Amen!” But then enthusiasm fizzles out in a short time.

“Who’s your One?” may be the most significant initiative Southern Baptists have ever undertaken. What would it look like if you utilized a strategy that got your groups on and off campus involved in “Who’s your One?” as a group strategy?

Mark Clifton of the North American Mission Board says, “If you want your church to become a congregation that makes disciples that make disciples, you have to get your people into discipling relationships with one another.”

It’s more efficient and effective to teach evangelistic tools like the “3 Circles” in a group setting. It’s even more important to teach not only what the gospel is but what the gospel does. The gospel restores our relationship with God, our relationships with others and our relationship to ourselves. Relationships are important — not only to those inside the church but to those outside as well.

Groups decentralize your church. In group life people are more focused on “being” the church in everyday life rather than “doing” church. People outside of the church are not looking for religion. They are looking for relationships.

In an article for Lifeway’s Facts & Trends, Alex Himaya wrote:

“Starting with love and relationship rather than religion doesn’t change my beliefs; it changes how I communicate my beliefs. Everyday I’m trying to mimic the same manner that Jesus used when he talked to people. When he encountered the woman at the well (John 4) he didn’t start with her multiple marriages and adulterous lifestyle. He started with a simple request that began a relationship, ‘Can I have a drink of water?’

Why is this important? The Bible says so.

Scripture teaches us to be disciples and to live and share the gospel. A new strategy is to use your groups to create action for “Who’s Your One?” initiative in your church. Here are a few ideas:

  • Train your group leaders and teachers in the “3 Circles.” Teach them what the gospel is and what it does.
  • Have every member of your group identify one person they know. Encourage them to love and build an authentic relationship with that person.
  • Invite those individuals to the group and group functions so they can experience relationships instead of religion.
  • Have gospel conversations with the new people you have established trust with.
  • Fight for them and not against them.

John O’Brien, co-author of The Power of Purpose offers an additional insight into Drucker’s famous quote about culture eating strategy for breakfast. O’Brien writes, “Culture eats strategy for breakfast, but culture gets its appetite from purpose.”

Going beyond an understanding of what the gospel is to what the gospel does will significantly impact your congregation and those with whom they share the gospel.

Connect through Others: Intercede for Your One

If a new Christian’s only way to learn about prayer was by sitting in your Sunday School class or small group, would they learn how important it is to pray for a lost family member or friend (their “One”)?

If your group experience is like some I’ve had, a baby Christian might learn that prayer is only for physical needs. To be specific, “Aunt Jane’s third cousin’s former classmate’s mother’s cat who may need to have an appendectomy the fifth of next month. Pending the outcome of tests. If they can get an appointment.” Okay, maybe that’s an extreme fictitious example (maybe…), but it seems some groups pray for everything except the spiritual needs of people.

How do we encourage group members to pray regularly for their “Ones”? Here are some ideas to consider for your next gathering:

  • Explain that today you will have two group prayer times, the first for friends and family who have physical needs and the second to pray for the spiritual needs of “Your One.”
  • God often uses physical healing to initiate spiritual healing. When group members request prayer for family and friends’ physical needs, ask them to include any spiritual needs that person may also have.
  • Invite a new Christian to share their story of coming to Christ, including how the prayers of others were important in the process.
  • When you are teaching from a passage on how the gospel spreads, invite a group member to tell about their “One.” Pause to pray for opportunities and receptivity in their relationship. (This one would be great to use regularly.)

Often what we do in our groups teaches more vividly than what we say. What is your group teaching about praying for those who need Jesus?

Connect Through Prayer and Bible Study 2: Speak to God

Prayer and Bible study are powerful tools for connecting. When we pray with people, we demonstrate that we care and that God cares. When we open God’s Word together, we hear His plan to love us into relationship with Him through Jesus.

What are practical ways to connect through prayer and Bible study? Take these actions together:

  1. Bible study. Open God’s Word together. Examine the context. Together seek to understand what God’s message was to the original hearers. What was the point of the passage? Then seek to apply that message or point to life today. Finally seek to understand God’s personal message to each of you.
  2. When you opened God’s Word, He spoke. Now, what is your response to what God said in Bible study? This is your opportunity to agree with Him, to confess to Him, and to make requests of Him in response. Speak, write, or pray your response to Him.
  3. God spoke. You responded, but God expects change as a result of the encounter with Him in His Word. What does He want you to do, and are you willing to do what He expects? Are you willing to commit to change? Tell Him in prayer or writing.
  4. To this point, you have not carried out the change that God desires. It is important to review your response to His expectations over the next few days. Are you making progress? Bottom line: did I do what God expected? The is where the encouragement of a friend or reviewing a journal can help us to keep our commitments to God.

These steps of prayer and Bible study offer great opportunities for connecting. They allow us to demonstrate transparency. We become encouragers and cheerleaders. Connections matter!

Darryl Wilson serves as Sunday School & Discipleship Consultant for the Kentucky Baptist Convention and is the author of the Sunday School Revolutionary blog. He served churches in Kentucky and South Carolina as Minister of Education & Administration.