Group gatherings. Some groups forego them altogether. A group member in Albuquerque, New Mexico, recently approached me at the end of a workshop I led at the state’s annual evangelism conference. She lamented the fact that her teacher does not believe in group gatherings and their class has dwindled because of it. In his opinion, the teaching time should be enough.

Groups do need to be together. We are seeing this during the COVID-19 crisis. Churches and groups have scrambled to find ways to keep people connected online. The church has realized the power of fellowship and gathering as the church, even if it is digitally.

But the author of It Begins with Prayer challenges us to consider the problem with group gatherings in chapter 2. Exactly how could gathering together be a “problem”? Groups organize fellowships, like picnics. People bring food. Games are played. Friendly competition takes place. People enjoy their time together. But the author asks a haunting question: “…But have we done anything that really builds community?”

We might be tempted to say, “Well of course we built community!” But a shared experience doesn’t necessarily build community. Think of it this way. If you attend a sporting event in a stadium of some sort and watch a game with 20,000 others people, did you build community? What about the last airplane flight you took? You flew with 180 people, but did you really build community? Of course you had a shared experience, but did you leave the event knowing people more deeply? Did you really build community?

Do we settle for shared experiences as groups when we really need real community? That’s the question we must answer. Shared experiences are good and needed, for sure. But perhaps what is needed more is a way for people to experience a deeper level of community. In the next blog post, we’ll answer the question, “What is real community?”

One of my favorite cartoons on prayer shows a woman standing in a group, all heads bowed, saying, “Lord, I lay before you the prayer concerns voiced this morning…even though most of ‘em sound like whining to me.” Not everyone has the same perspective on prayer requests, do they?

As a group leader you have the joy and responsibility of developing a praying group. Part of that is cultivating a healthy approach to sharing prayer requests. Periodic discussions on the topic could easily fit into a Bible study related to prayer, or may be a specific time set aside when the group is together. Either way, leaders should not assume all group members are on the same page regarding how—or if—prayer requests should be communicated. At least two questions should guide your group.

With whom should prayer requests be shared?

The answer is, “it depends.” While some group members may assume that any prayer request they hear should be shared with all concerned believers (we’re all family, right?), a good guideline for groups is that members will not share prayer requests outside the group unless the requestor has give permission to do so.

Some group leaders have developed the good habit of asking, “May we share that with others?” Some groups pass around a prayer request sheet for people to list their requests, and include a check box to indicate if they “may be shared with others.”

Whatever approach you take with your group, guard the trust that is essential for people to stay engaged in the discipleship process with each other.

How should prayer requests be communicated?

“One person’s prayer request is another person’s gossip.” On the other hand, a wise leader or group member is thoughtful about sharing requests. Knowing all the facts does not mean all the facts must be shared. “Bill is receiving treatment for a health problem” is far different than “You know Bill just hasn’t taken care of himself, and it’s finally caught up with him!” Help your group members develop a sensitive heart—and words—when it comes to communicating a prayer request.

Cultivating a group that takes seriously its responsibility to pray for each other takes some thought and effort, but a praying group is a blessing to all who are in it.

And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people. (Eph 6:18)

Written by David Adams, Director of Discipleship/Adult Specialist, Baptist General Convention of Texas